Life and Times of the Pranksters of Hogwarts
by Krookshank's Keeper
Summary: This is a collection of stories that Scarlet White and i, Magical Mystery Girl wrote together. It contains our stories that we make up together on the walk home. It can go from the Marauders to the twins to the future Weasly children. NO SLASH!


**All right this is a story that my friend Scarlet White and I wrote together, just give it a chance and you might just like it. It is under my name but SW is writing some of the chapters. R&R you know what to do!! (No I do not think of Sirius this way for future reference )**

James' First Date...

It all began on a crisp spring day, the flowers are blooming, the  
water is glowing, the leaves are falling... Wait a second, leaves are  
falling? Oh yeah, that would be because Peter is up on a tree, straining to reach an apple.

Remus is trying to get him to work off his fatness. Inside the apple is a certificate for Honeydukes for 300 Galleons worth of anything. (What Peter doesn't know is that it's fake, and that Sirius made it earlier that morning.) As Remus is watching the fat boy's attempts, any hope of his getting that Transfiguration assignment done was slowly draining down to nil.

James was off wooing Lily by the Quidditch field, and Sirius was poking his tongue out between his teeth, trying to write something legibly on the back of his old Potions assignment.

It had a huge F on the back for 'illegible reading and incorrect spelling.' When Sirius had received it back he had gotten mad and shouted at their teacher, Professor Slughorn, "It's not like that idiot can spell or write clear either." He exclaimed pointing at Snape, "I mean; it looks like spiders crawled into his ink pot, and then proceeded to crawl all over his paper.'  
He looked at the paper, looked at Remus, then groaned hitting his head on the tree behind him. "Moony!" he exclaimed exasperated.  
Remus looked over form Peter desperately clinging to the branch to  
stay aloft. "Yes Paddy"' he asked annoyingly in that voice Sirius knew he only used to annoy him.  
Sirius groaned. Yep Remus definitely knew how much that girly nickname ticked him off. "How do you spell, 'moron?'"  
Remus blinked at him. Then raising his eyebrows he shook his head and with an evil sort of gleam in his eye that Sirius missed, he began to spell. "M-a-r-a-u-d-e-r."  
Sirius grinned up at Remus, his complete trust in his friend apparent in his eyes. "Thanks Mooney, I owe you one."  
Remus, having heard this many times and deciding to keep track years ago, whipped up his little chalkboard he carried with him everywhere.  
It had little tally marks that had amounted up to 729 already. He flicked  
his wand and it read 730. He showed it to Sirius, who groaned when he saw it.  
"Great, well, ten more to go before I actually have to do an assignment." He paused "By my self. Without Moony. All alone. No help." He shuddered.  
Remus looked at the piece of paper Sirius held in his hand deciding to see if his brainwashing had really done its job. "Sirius, what does that sign say?" he asked slowly, a smirk on his face.  
Sirius looked proud and raised it for Remus to see. "It says "I am a moron."  
Remus nodded. "Very nice I'm, sure." When in Actuality, the sign read "I am a Marauder." but who was Remus to mess with creativity?

2 hours later

Lily came running up to James. "James Harold Potter I'd never would've  
thought it of you! You are a much different person then I have ever imagined. You really must have taken my words to heart."  
James looked at her, confused. "Um... What did I do?"  
Lilly grinned. "You were nice to Severus today."  
James nodded pleased with himself, not knowing what Lily was really referring to. "Yep, in Potions today, for example, I only blew up his  
cauldron in his face. I could've blown it up all over him instead"  
Lily frowned at him. "Because I'm so happy with you right now, I'll let that  
one slide."  
James looked at her weird now, racking his brains for what _he _had done to make Lily happy. "Then what the devil did I do?"  
Lily smiled. "You let Severus into your little club. I'm so proud of you!"  
She hugged him.  
James pretended to be happy too, like he knew it all along, but inside he  
was fuming. Lily didn't stop talking. 'Let's meet for dinner tonight, just  
the two of us. How about it?"  
James nodded, never taking his eyes off of her smiling face. As soon as she left he stalked over to the other Marauders who were cheering Peter on as his pudgy fingers grasped for the apple. "WHO PUT THAT SIGN ON SNAPE'S UNWORTHY BACK?????" he thundered, knocking Peter out of the tree.  
Sirius smiled and held up his hand. "I did it James; did everyone make fun  
of him?"  
"Pray tell Sirius, what, exactly does the sign say?"  
"I am a Moron." Sirius stated conspiratorially like he knew something the rest of the world didn't.

Just then, none other than Severus Snape walked by, nose held high in the air. The sign stuck to his back. James ran up and yanked it off. Reading it he held it up and shook it at his friends. Remus was now trying to keep down his laughter.  
"Who told u how to spell moron?" James asked his teeth clenched.  
Sirius pointed at Remus still not getting the fact that James was mad at him.. "Moony did. He's the smart one around here after all."  
James rounded on Remus his eyes blazing. "So, you don't know how to spell anything either." He stated accusingly.  
Remus began in his calm voice, finally getting his laughter under control "Now James, I didn't mean..."  
James cut him off as Peter came tumbling from the tree, having tried to climb it again. "I guess Remus isn't the smart one here after all. Even Peter knows how to spell moron." He turned to Peter who was rubbing his fat bottom. "Peter, how do you spell Moron?"  
Peter smiled this was an easy question, "M-O-R-I-N." He answered bobbing his head to show e knew this to be true.  
James howled. "NO YOU IMBECILES!!!!! Gosh! You all must be on muggle drugs or something. Even I know it's spelled with two n's."  
At the date.  
Lilly looked at James, who was shifting around uncomfortably in his seat.  
"James, is something the matter?"  
James shook his head. "Nothings the matter, why would you think anything's the matter? 'Cause nothings the matter. Nope nothing, not one thing at all. Why do you ask?" James answered nervously.  
Lily looked at him. "James, are you sure you wrote that sign?"  
James shook his head. "I didn't, but Sirius did."  
Lily looked at him fidgeting. "James, are you lying to me?"  
James shook his head. "No, I'm not lying to you."  
"Are you lying to me for lying about lying?"  
"Yes, I mean no I mean... what was the question?" James asked holding a hand to his forehead.  
Lily groaned. " MERLIN!! DONT' TELL ME IT WAS A MISTAKE!!!"  
James nodded sulkily, and then told her the whole story. She was furious with rage. She got up form the table, and threw what appeared to be her napkin at him. She left, then at the door she turned around. "Bye the way Potter," She looked at him coldly, "it's M-o-r-O-n.' then she left.  
James opened the napkin, it said on it in Lily's cursive green writing.  
(Heide, put it in Italics.) **_"I might consider Wednesday if you bring me a  
bottle of fire whisky."_**

Now young readers how James got that Fire whiskey is a completely different story.

**That is it folks!! The first chapter! Now don't get me wrong both SW and I love HP but it is so fun to think that these people would really do something like this. Can't you just see it? If you like it and want us to continue please R&R we wont update until we get at least 5 updates!! So bring them in quickly.**


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